Just a little over eight years ago, when I was still a (non-art) student, I submitted my first deviations to DA. One of these deviations was the picture tat you see on the left
side of this meme. I was very proud of it. Later I had to put it in storage, because I was ashamed.
Today I decided to remake this particular picture, because it deserved it. I wanted it to be pretty then, and I still do. I have changed pretty much everything, the composition, the angle from which we look at the character, character design, time of day, even the mood of the picture. But in truth, it is still the same place, the same girl, the same day as eight years ago. And it will still be the same eight years from now. Seen differently, but unchanged in the essence.
What I regret is this:
most of the eight years in between these two images, I was so stupid, so lazy and so self-content that I never made an effort to learn a thing. I thought that the skill would come with time. It won't. Unless you work on it, unless you challenge yourself every day, it won't. If I understood it earlier, I might have been a better artist already.
What I wish is this: when, in some years, I put today's picture on the left side of this meme, and some picture that I'll be able to draw then, on the right, I want to feel the same things as I feel now:
- a little disbelief - "Was that my work then? Is this my work now? It is like two different people made these."
- a little pride - "I surely have improved. It is not only me who can notice the fact."
- and a lot of understanding that I still have a lot to learn, a lot of wonderful, interesting, fascinating things that will make me even better (and all those who watch what I do, somewhat happier, hopefully).
There are a lot of "I"-s in this description. Heh. That sounds kinda self-centered, but then again, it's a very personal confession that I'm making here.